Wednesday, February 2, 2011
On "It's Time"
The time has come...my blog needs a new name. I've changed significantly in the years since I began writing and I think this blog should reflect that. I'm searching for a new name, something not so cutesy. Suggestions??
Thursday, January 13, 2011
On a middle-class life
Sorry that this post is so terribly long; it's an assignment that I had to do for my sociology class. We were supposed to write about our experiences with social classes and social inequality then explain what the two terms meant to us. I'm not really sure that I successfully answered the prompt, but I like the way it turned out so I'm sharing:
I come from what used to be a very small town; the community is growing and inches more and more towards becoming suburbia every day. You can’t expect to know everyone, but you can expect to discover at least one person you know every time you go to the grocery store. It is a town where the friends you make are close ones, and to me this means that the people of the community like being there for one another, no matter the circumstances. The majority of the population falls in the middle-class financially. Because of the particular experiences of my family, I associate living a middle-class life with living in a community of neighbors who share your struggles and your successes and are available and willing to offer any needed help. From my childhood, my parents have instilled in me a compassion for the needs of others as well as a sense of duty to try my best to alleviate those needs. They emblazoned this on my heart not through lectures, by through the example of their own actions.
One example that I remember most vividly because of the way it affected me as a child, is when my parents gave away their mattress. A family from the church we attended needed a new bed after the traumatic death of a family member. Immediately after learning of the need, my parents shoved their own mattress out of the house, into an awaiting trailer, and then to the home of the family. This particularly affected me because in the weeks before they bought a new mattress, my parents slept in my bed and I had to take on less comfortable lodgings. Being young, I didn’t understand the need my parents felt to make such a sacrifice. Since then however, I realize that from that experience I gleaned that helping others at one’s own expense is something that’s just expected in my family and to some extent in my town. Though my family did not immediately have the funds to buy a new bed, the need of the other family was more pressing and now that I am older, I see the sacrifice of my parents as less strange. I now believe that living in a middle-class community requires pulling together to share resources.
Another episode, which occurred when I was much older, brought me to another conclusion about social class. In November 2005, my town suffered a devastating tornado. The storm flattened the homes of many families; the neighborhood just behind my home was almost completely destroyed. Although we lost 26 trees from our backyard, my family was blessed to have our home still intact. The morning after the storm, my mom and I piled a wagon with sodas, coffee, and sandwiches then headed for our neighbors. In the neighborhood behind us, I saw the desperation on the faces of those who had just lost their homes. They stood amongst the rubble and were so grateful just to get something to drink. These people were my community, and I felt their anxiety, but I could not entirely sympathize. Suddenly these devastated people became “the poor” and “the needy” in my eyes. Overnight a neighborhood of ordinary middle-class folks had become those I pitied. This sense heightened when buses came to take these families to hotels or relatives. The road to get to the neighborhood was blocked by fallen electrical lines. With my parents’ permission, the families pulled their suitcases and wheelbarrows, full of their salvaged belongings, through our backyard, past our home, and to the awaiting buses. All I could do was to sit in stunned silence as the people filed passed our open kitchen door. My neighbors now seemed like charity cases. My family suddenly seemed to be of a higher social class because we had resources that those around us did not. Looking back on this event, I now believe that social class is determined by perspective.
From these experiences that I have described, I have gained my understanding of social class and social inequality. To me, social class is a general term to describe one’s status in his or her community. Because of the way our brains work, humans are more comfortable when we can put things into groups. The grouping of people in our minds is often based on our perceptions of social class. While statistics can determine someone’s comparable financial status, most social classes are relatively unspoken but tremendously felt based on one’s perceptions. Social class is all about the possession or lack of resources; this can be literal or simply perceived. All of the connotations and behaviors associated with the different “classes” in this country have their roots in the differing of resources. This partially feeds my perception of the middle-class as those who help others. I believe that this association is quite logical. The middle-class is most equipped to offer aid. Those in the middle-class have relatively stable finances and often the resources to aid those in need. They also are not exempt from struggles with money and can empathize when others need assistance. Those in the lower-class can better sympathize with need, but do not have the resources to meet needs. Those in the upper-class have plenty of resources, but cannot identify with their neighbors who struggle. I believe that social inequality is the thoughts and actions that arise from our perceptions of differentiated social classes. I experienced this after the tornado, when I saw my neighbors in a new way. My new impression of these people as having “less” than I did, placed them in a different category than myself. Social inequality becomes a major problem when an impression like the one I felt that day affects lawmakers and other people of influence. This term has negative connotations, but truly comes from a very I instinctual place in the human mind that feels the need to make associations. These groups we mentally create foster social inequality, but is that a tragedy? If my parents had not been able to make these distinctions, would they feel so inclined to always offer help? Do some of our perceptions of social class inspire our actions to “make the world a better place”? If there was no social inequality, could there be helpful, closely knit communities like mine? These questions will follow me into further exploration of social class and inequality.
I come from what used to be a very small town; the community is growing and inches more and more towards becoming suburbia every day. You can’t expect to know everyone, but you can expect to discover at least one person you know every time you go to the grocery store. It is a town where the friends you make are close ones, and to me this means that the people of the community like being there for one another, no matter the circumstances. The majority of the population falls in the middle-class financially. Because of the particular experiences of my family, I associate living a middle-class life with living in a community of neighbors who share your struggles and your successes and are available and willing to offer any needed help. From my childhood, my parents have instilled in me a compassion for the needs of others as well as a sense of duty to try my best to alleviate those needs. They emblazoned this on my heart not through lectures, by through the example of their own actions.
One example that I remember most vividly because of the way it affected me as a child, is when my parents gave away their mattress. A family from the church we attended needed a new bed after the traumatic death of a family member. Immediately after learning of the need, my parents shoved their own mattress out of the house, into an awaiting trailer, and then to the home of the family. This particularly affected me because in the weeks before they bought a new mattress, my parents slept in my bed and I had to take on less comfortable lodgings. Being young, I didn’t understand the need my parents felt to make such a sacrifice. Since then however, I realize that from that experience I gleaned that helping others at one’s own expense is something that’s just expected in my family and to some extent in my town. Though my family did not immediately have the funds to buy a new bed, the need of the other family was more pressing and now that I am older, I see the sacrifice of my parents as less strange. I now believe that living in a middle-class community requires pulling together to share resources.
Another episode, which occurred when I was much older, brought me to another conclusion about social class. In November 2005, my town suffered a devastating tornado. The storm flattened the homes of many families; the neighborhood just behind my home was almost completely destroyed. Although we lost 26 trees from our backyard, my family was blessed to have our home still intact. The morning after the storm, my mom and I piled a wagon with sodas, coffee, and sandwiches then headed for our neighbors. In the neighborhood behind us, I saw the desperation on the faces of those who had just lost their homes. They stood amongst the rubble and were so grateful just to get something to drink. These people were my community, and I felt their anxiety, but I could not entirely sympathize. Suddenly these devastated people became “the poor” and “the needy” in my eyes. Overnight a neighborhood of ordinary middle-class folks had become those I pitied. This sense heightened when buses came to take these families to hotels or relatives. The road to get to the neighborhood was blocked by fallen electrical lines. With my parents’ permission, the families pulled their suitcases and wheelbarrows, full of their salvaged belongings, through our backyard, past our home, and to the awaiting buses. All I could do was to sit in stunned silence as the people filed passed our open kitchen door. My neighbors now seemed like charity cases. My family suddenly seemed to be of a higher social class because we had resources that those around us did not. Looking back on this event, I now believe that social class is determined by perspective.
From these experiences that I have described, I have gained my understanding of social class and social inequality. To me, social class is a general term to describe one’s status in his or her community. Because of the way our brains work, humans are more comfortable when we can put things into groups. The grouping of people in our minds is often based on our perceptions of social class. While statistics can determine someone’s comparable financial status, most social classes are relatively unspoken but tremendously felt based on one’s perceptions. Social class is all about the possession or lack of resources; this can be literal or simply perceived. All of the connotations and behaviors associated with the different “classes” in this country have their roots in the differing of resources. This partially feeds my perception of the middle-class as those who help others. I believe that this association is quite logical. The middle-class is most equipped to offer aid. Those in the middle-class have relatively stable finances and often the resources to aid those in need. They also are not exempt from struggles with money and can empathize when others need assistance. Those in the lower-class can better sympathize with need, but do not have the resources to meet needs. Those in the upper-class have plenty of resources, but cannot identify with their neighbors who struggle. I believe that social inequality is the thoughts and actions that arise from our perceptions of differentiated social classes. I experienced this after the tornado, when I saw my neighbors in a new way. My new impression of these people as having “less” than I did, placed them in a different category than myself. Social inequality becomes a major problem when an impression like the one I felt that day affects lawmakers and other people of influence. This term has negative connotations, but truly comes from a very I instinctual place in the human mind that feels the need to make associations. These groups we mentally create foster social inequality, but is that a tragedy? If my parents had not been able to make these distinctions, would they feel so inclined to always offer help? Do some of our perceptions of social class inspire our actions to “make the world a better place”? If there was no social inequality, could there be helpful, closely knit communities like mine? These questions will follow me into further exploration of social class and inequality.
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
On I hear you, I see you
I recently had a slight problem in one of my classes. I emailed my prof about it and never heard anything back. When I asked her about my situation at the next class session, she told me not to worry about it, that it would get resolved. I thanked her but asked if she could reply to my email anyway, "I have been having issues with my messages not being received and I want to make sure my email is working properly." That was a complete lie. My email was working fine...I was just wanted a response. She never did reply to that email, or resolve (so I thought) the issue. So a couple weeks later, I sent another message. People are busy, especially profs, right? It makes sense that one email got overlooked. Still no response after the second email and I'm starting to get upset. I need this problem solved. My third, and slightly more direct (fine rude!) email finally solicited a reply. In reading her message, I found no resolution to my problem, but still I was elated. Despite the fact that she had provided basically no help, I was thrilled to receive a response. Why did this matter to me so much? Apparently (because now I'm completely at ease) I cared more about receiving some kind of acknowledgement than I did resolving the problem. Again, why? The idea that I was not being heard made me extremely uncomfortable. How did you miss my messages? Even a quick reply of "I don't know" would have placated me. When my prof finally did respond, I relaxed and realized how obnoxiously single minded I appeared. I needed that acknowledgement! That, "I hear you, I see you." Is that due to a personal insecurity...or is this a natural thing? I know that there's no perfect analogy, but I feel like this situation has some faith applications. Can you think of somebody else who often has to go without getting acknowledged? Doesn't it just sting a little when you get that, "Wow, now you know how I feel everyday" ? Geez, huh? I hear You, I see You.
Thursday, November 4, 2010
On Not as Good as Yesterday
I am slowly losing my integrity
By writing this down in my speech class
Or maybe not
I am kind of focusing
On what is being said
It's weird because I just wrote
Yesterday
If I wrote a poem a day
It wouldn't keep away the doctor
But would you collect them up
And bind them in a book
To await wandering eyes
And curious brains?
My foot just fell asleep
Is that interesting to you?
No?
My foot rests inside a purple Converse shoe
How about now?
Is it necessary that I be
Mesmerizing, mystifying, hauntingly wonderful
For you to really really want my words?
Now my whole leg is asleep
Knock knock
Who's there?
Why, it's Mary Lennox
Back again
"Might I have a bit of earth?"
Golly, I've got a one track mind
But really I hurt for her
She just wants to feel important
How can I help her feel special?
Know that she doesn't have to seek out
These other things
God, help me give her a bit of earth
In my life'
Give her a chance to grow something beautiful
That can be shared
That I can appreciate
Help me, help me, help me
To be patient
And to open up my world
To show love
Because really
My life is good
I am hungry
Ready to leave class and go to lunch
But I like the necklace I'm wearing
And I have a heart
Full of hope
By writing this down in my speech class
Or maybe not
I am kind of focusing
On what is being said
It's weird because I just wrote
Yesterday
If I wrote a poem a day
It wouldn't keep away the doctor
But would you collect them up
And bind them in a book
To await wandering eyes
And curious brains?
My foot just fell asleep
Is that interesting to you?
No?
My foot rests inside a purple Converse shoe
How about now?
Is it necessary that I be
Mesmerizing, mystifying, hauntingly wonderful
For you to really really want my words?
Now my whole leg is asleep
Knock knock
Who's there?
Why, it's Mary Lennox
Back again
"Might I have a bit of earth?"
Golly, I've got a one track mind
But really I hurt for her
She just wants to feel important
How can I help her feel special?
Know that she doesn't have to seek out
These other things
God, help me give her a bit of earth
In my life'
Give her a chance to grow something beautiful
That can be shared
That I can appreciate
Help me, help me, help me
To be patient
And to open up my world
To show love
Because really
My life is good
I am hungry
Ready to leave class and go to lunch
But I like the necklace I'm wearing
And I have a heart
Full of hope
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
On The Strength of Input
Swing low sweet chariot
Come forth an whisk me away
Because the more I stare at this beautiful globe
The more I feel confined by our planet
By my vocabulary
By gravity
By my perceptions, or worse: yours
I like to think about life, existence, and the essence of humanity
But clearly my cardigan gives that away
It doesn't have to be all introspection
All philosophy
I can give you some attention too
If you are Mary Lennox, asking me, Archibald Craven
For a bit of earth
Evidence that you matter
That you effect the world
I can oblige
Everybody needs a little affirmation
Maybe that's why I like writing letters so much
It's so focused
So personal
So unlike what I'm surrounded by
We miss moments
Moments that could provide clarity
We overlook the beauty and the connectedness of it all
How I am shaped by:
Silly songs and stories created with my grandparents during childhood
My memory of these songs, these moments that I can share when I sing a baby to sleep
The world of literature that activates the mind
And suddenly allows my own happenings to intermingle with every story I've encountered
My brother and sister who are my peers and my children
That now when I visit home, it's a delight to wake up to them
Traditions that are dear, and people that are dear too
The evenings spent in the safety of red Koolaid
The comfort of the bowl of M&Ms
And the joy of each other's company
Nothing is distinct
All comes together in a rush
To some, a picture's worth a thousand words
But to me, a word is worth a thousand memories
The details of eighteen summers, two surprise birthday parties, and countless bowls of chicken noodle soup
Hurricaning in my brain as I wait at the train station
Waiting for a bunch of blue ribbons
Beginning to doubt the promise will be fulfilled
Gripping the bench seat, knowing it's been days
And Johnny's still not back from the fair
I fret and I worry
But then remember
That's it's really okay
Because the romance is in the waiting
Come forth an whisk me away
Because the more I stare at this beautiful globe
The more I feel confined by our planet
By my vocabulary
By gravity
By my perceptions, or worse: yours
I like to think about life, existence, and the essence of humanity
But clearly my cardigan gives that away
It doesn't have to be all introspection
All philosophy
I can give you some attention too
If you are Mary Lennox, asking me, Archibald Craven
For a bit of earth
Evidence that you matter
That you effect the world
I can oblige
Everybody needs a little affirmation
Maybe that's why I like writing letters so much
It's so focused
So personal
So unlike what I'm surrounded by
We miss moments
Moments that could provide clarity
We overlook the beauty and the connectedness of it all
How I am shaped by:
Silly songs and stories created with my grandparents during childhood
My memory of these songs, these moments that I can share when I sing a baby to sleep
The world of literature that activates the mind
And suddenly allows my own happenings to intermingle with every story I've encountered
My brother and sister who are my peers and my children
That now when I visit home, it's a delight to wake up to them
Traditions that are dear, and people that are dear too
The evenings spent in the safety of red Koolaid
The comfort of the bowl of M&Ms
And the joy of each other's company
Nothing is distinct
All comes together in a rush
To some, a picture's worth a thousand words
But to me, a word is worth a thousand memories
The details of eighteen summers, two surprise birthday parties, and countless bowls of chicken noodle soup
Hurricaning in my brain as I wait at the train station
Waiting for a bunch of blue ribbons
Beginning to doubt the promise will be fulfilled
Gripping the bench seat, knowing it's been days
And Johnny's still not back from the fair
I fret and I worry
But then remember
That's it's really okay
Because the romance is in the waiting
Sunday, September 5, 2010
On learning stuff in college
So this semester I'm taking a special class called War and Peace in the Western Tradition. A couple days ago, we were discussing the ancient Hebrew people. From the discussion and my reading, I came to something that I think is pretty interesting...
When we read the Old Testament, the Israelites seem like losers again and again and again. They have a really hard time following and being obedient to God and this gets them into a lot of trouble. Their distrust and doubt causes them to wander in the desert for 40 years, their plea for a king leads to all the depressing years of the book of Judges, they divide and get almost entirely crushed, etc etc etc. We walk away from the passages marveling at how "God's chosen people" just screwed everything up over and over.
From my history book however, I came across an idea that cuts them a little, actually a lot of slack. In one passage the text describes how as the chosen ones of God, the Israelites were not permitted to live as the rest of the world lives. It said that God wanted them to be an example to all the other nations, by living in the way He prescribed. Later in the text, it was discussed how much of our Western Culture has been influenced by the ancient Hebrews. Way back when, Mesopotamians and later Greeks and Romans were the world's powerful peoples. But somehow, the ideals of our Western Tradition mostly trace back to the Israelites and not the other groups. God gave the Hebrews a very strong sense of self and sense of value that the other cultures did not see in individuals, that sounds familiar. Come to think of it, in our society, last time I checked, it is far more common to worship one all-powerful God, than it is to believe in Zeus and Apollo and the gang.
When I really began to think about it...I decided that it's true. We live our lives a lot more like those wandering Israelites than like any of those other ancient people. Those rules laid out in Leviticus, we follow a lot of them: We don't marry our cows, or mothers. We consider it a good idea to get our overflowing sores checked out. We don't where clothes that have mildew on them. We appoint judges over us rather than follow Hammurabi's code. I could go on and on. I ramble on like this only to get to the point that maybe those Israelites back then didn't make as much of a mess of things as we think sometimes. Maybe. because so much of their lifestyle (hello, the first five books of the Old Testament) has been preserved and is still read and some of it practiced today...maybe they actually did their job.
It looks like God's chosen people really did set an example for the other nations with their lives. Maybe when we read the Bible and roll our eyes as people get swallowed up by the earth, maybe we can give these guys a little more credit.
When we read the Old Testament, the Israelites seem like losers again and again and again. They have a really hard time following and being obedient to God and this gets them into a lot of trouble. Their distrust and doubt causes them to wander in the desert for 40 years, their plea for a king leads to all the depressing years of the book of Judges, they divide and get almost entirely crushed, etc etc etc. We walk away from the passages marveling at how "God's chosen people" just screwed everything up over and over.
From my history book however, I came across an idea that cuts them a little, actually a lot of slack. In one passage the text describes how as the chosen ones of God, the Israelites were not permitted to live as the rest of the world lives. It said that God wanted them to be an example to all the other nations, by living in the way He prescribed. Later in the text, it was discussed how much of our Western Culture has been influenced by the ancient Hebrews. Way back when, Mesopotamians and later Greeks and Romans were the world's powerful peoples. But somehow, the ideals of our Western Tradition mostly trace back to the Israelites and not the other groups. God gave the Hebrews a very strong sense of self and sense of value that the other cultures did not see in individuals, that sounds familiar. Come to think of it, in our society, last time I checked, it is far more common to worship one all-powerful God, than it is to believe in Zeus and Apollo and the gang.
When I really began to think about it...I decided that it's true. We live our lives a lot more like those wandering Israelites than like any of those other ancient people. Those rules laid out in Leviticus, we follow a lot of them: We don't marry our cows, or mothers. We consider it a good idea to get our overflowing sores checked out. We don't where clothes that have mildew on them. We appoint judges over us rather than follow Hammurabi's code. I could go on and on. I ramble on like this only to get to the point that maybe those Israelites back then didn't make as much of a mess of things as we think sometimes. Maybe. because so much of their lifestyle (hello, the first five books of the Old Testament) has been preserved and is still read and some of it practiced today...maybe they actually did their job.
It looks like God's chosen people really did set an example for the other nations with their lives. Maybe when we read the Bible and roll our eyes as people get swallowed up by the earth, maybe we can give these guys a little more credit.
Monday, August 30, 2010
On breathtaking
Frustration.
Annoyance.
Maybe a little bit of anger and bitterness.
Really? Everyone else is just here to get their MRS degree?
Really?
This is the obsession.
Seems like every waking moment.
It's not actually.
But it seems like it.
That's not why I came to college.
Fed up with so many GIRLS!
And then...
We're all together
And voices are lifted high in worship
Just a piano
And so many voices
Girls singing beautifully
Living in community
And I'm reminded
YOU'RE so much bigger
Than any complaint
Or frustration
And I'm amazed
Once again
At how you bring me back
Refocus
And it's all good.
Annoyance.
Maybe a little bit of anger and bitterness.
Really? Everyone else is just here to get their MRS degree?
Really?
This is the obsession.
Seems like every waking moment.
It's not actually.
But it seems like it.
That's not why I came to college.
Fed up with so many GIRLS!
And then...
We're all together
And voices are lifted high in worship
Just a piano
And so many voices
Girls singing beautifully
Living in community
And I'm reminded
YOU'RE so much bigger
Than any complaint
Or frustration
And I'm amazed
Once again
At how you bring me back
Refocus
And it's all good.
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