On "God bless us every one!"

...said Tiny Tim the last of all, wanna know why?

Cause his family got a Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!

Oh yeah

On where's my dreamboat?

Just reminding myself:



Her smile is big. Her teeth shine as brilliant white in the celestial glow. Her radiance comes from the joy she feels, a joy so complete and overwhelming, it cannot compare to anything she has ever felt before. Though she wears no makeup, her cheeks glows as though kissed by the loveliest pink rose.The Princess.While she awaits her knight, knowing he is soon to come riding on his white horse, she wears her white gown and skips merrily. The dress is the purest most beautiful white, in representation of the new cleanliness of her heart. White petals fall lightly to the ground from the wreath on her head as she dances about. She is unable to contain her happiness, her bare feet trip over each other during her childlike celebration.She wears her hair loose in long ringlets down her back like she did when she was a little girl. In her hands, she carries a bouquet of white dandelions, her favorite, but they are not separated by the wind, but remain connected as if in a dream. But this is no dream, she knows it cannot be. This is more rare and perfect and beautiful than any dream she's ever had.She twirls in circles, lifting her hands above her head, delighting, rejoicing in the glorious light. While turning, she gets her first glimpse of him. He is quietly ascending the hill, strong and sure-footed. One look into his all-seeing eyes and she knows it's him The Prince (Jesus)He is the one she's been waiting for. The passion of her heart. She sees him and knows the time has come; tears of unsurpassed joy well in her eyes. She has waited so long to see his face. She runs to him, a wild undignified canter.He sees her and laughs; he can't help but beam at her sheer enthusiasm and excitement. He is so glad she is his princess; he so delights in her. With his eyes, he takes in her human form and all her physical imperfections, but all his heart sees is beauty.He takes her hand gently, and together they walk through the garden. Neither needs to speak, he knows exactly what she is thinking, and she knows he loves her. This is all she ever need know. They gaze contentedly at the blooming flowers and magnificent trees, and listen to the whistling birds. Both he and she have yet to stop smiling. He kisses her on the cheek; it is a perfect, holy kiss. This is a kiss not of worldly love, but of pure, spiritual love.He leads her out of the garden gate and down the lane. It is time for the ceremony. All the angels are there, they have been awaiting the prince and princess. They have become the bridegroom and bride.The Wedding It is the most exciting, glorious celebration ever. There has never been a more perfect, happy wedding. The best part is that the Father is there. It has been his greatest desire to complete the joy of his daughter. He is beyond thrilled to see his princess smile and laugh as she dances with her life's love. She is finally with them, the Son and the Father. She has waited for so long! Together, the prince and princess blow on the bundle of dandelions, scattering the white seeds, getting some in their hair.The Ascension The Father embraces his princess in an affectionate, paternal hug. Then he sends the daughter off with her prince. The two go again into the garden, where he sends her flying high on the wooded swing. In the air, she laughs and sings joyously, thinking she may soon reach the clouds if she goes any higher. And then, she does. Together the prince and princess ascend into the sky.Once there, she takes her place amongst all the singing, dancing, worshipping princesses. Now she knows she can live forever with the prince and the father. This is her beautiful eternity.

On oh nostalgia...

We came across this little folder from my two year old preschool class...in the pictures I look like a boy no joke, but inside there was a descriptions of all the toddlers in the class. If anyone was wondering how and when I came to be as I am, just read what my 2 year preschool teacher had to say about me. It started a long time ago...
"Lindsey is a sweet, curly headed little girl who loves to spend time with her Mom, Erin. Especially when it means an outing to McDonald's for her favorite foods, chicken nuggets, french fries and a chocolate shake.
Reading is on of Lindsey's favorite activities. She loves to sit down by herself with a stack of books and won't get up until she has finished reading all of them! She has memorized many of the books and enjoys "reading" them to her Mom.
Another favorite activity of Lindsey's is pretending. She enjoys acting and reciting lines from movies such as Beauty and the Beast and The Wizard of Oz. She especially likes playing the nice/good roles of the movies."

Remember now, I was TWO!! Oh yea, two and already quoting movies...foreshadowing anyone?? Well, just a fun thing I thought I'd share :) And by the way, if you remember the Princess mitten blogged about many moons ago, they've made a come back. I bought some for ballerina friend Katy for her birthday...definitely.

(titled for Eric) On chivalric burquas?

Chivalry isn't dead!! It's a very happy thing I've discovered over the last few days...that's all I'm going to say about that. Now I want to talk about burquas. I've been reading this book about Afghanistan for my English class. In the novel, the husband asks his wife to wear a burqua so that other men wont see her face. The man says that his wife and their marriage is sacred and special and he doesn't want any impurities in it. At first, the woman is very flattered by his request. She fees protected and treasured. Now, I've always thought of burquas (which by the way is an amazing word) as being oppressive, but this new idea made me think. What if this idea actually is coming from a good place? Obviously, I have a clouded "western" view of the matter, and can't imagine what it would be like in a culture where wearing a burqua is commonplace. What I guess I've realized is that there are multiple sides to this. It isn't fair for me to criticize something that I really don't understand. We look at those who wear the burquas and call them oppressed, but they look at the way we dress and calls us trashy and immoral. I think it would be really interesting to wear a burqua for a day...open my eyes by covering them up (ha ha). This topic has just been making me think lately so I thought I'd share. What do you think?? Can the concept of the burqua been traced back to modesty and chivalry, or is it evil and limiting?

PS I was thinking about this just after I finished writing my article on prom for the newspaper. Burqua Prom, a weird, yet kind of cool visual no? Possibly a short story someday :)

On "be meaner, I'll like you better"

Ponder this with me if you will: why is it in our society that it is so acceptable, even attractive, to be "bad"? It seems to me that many people have this idea in their minds (especially teenagers) of what they're supposed to be like and it often ends up being not very nice. Why do we pat on the back those who curse and make crude jokes? Good for you, you're so bad. Really?? I don't understand this at all. When did our standards change? You grow up and are punished for lying, cheating, and stealing only to have your world turned upside down in young adulthood as everything screams "Lie! Cheat! Steal! You'll be cool!" Something is wrong when I'm in the minority for having and listening to a conscience. I don't think a good person is measured by the absence or presence of sin, we all sin. Rather, a good person is measured in what they do about their sin. To me it's pretty simple: you do something bad, you feel guilty, you repent, you try not to do it again, you feel better. Today the process for many seems to be: you do something bad, you tell your friends, they pat you on the back, you feel good and are anxious to do it again. We do bad thing to try and impress. How did this get started? It's extremely worrisome. Personally, being a good person makes me happy; it's not a chore. I used to try to be edgy or whatever to be impressive and I hated, I felt like crap all the time. So, is it just me here, am I backwards? Or, is the world peopled with massicists? Now, I am certainly not what I'd call persecuted for not being bad, but I'm definitely not applauded for it either. Thoughts????

On alert the media

It's almost Thanksgiving!! I have way to many things to be thankful for right now that they would definitely not all fit in one post. Please pray for my family as we head up to Ohio for the weekend that we have safe travels and all that. I'm looking forward to a relaxing break. Hope you all have a fabulous Turkey Day!!

On two questions for you...

I'm writing this piece for the Evansville Courier and Press. It's kind of a feature piece and is due December 1, to appear in the paper sometime later. They wanted a teenager to write about prom. I can pretty much write whatever I want. This is my idea and I wanted to see how you all felt about it and whether you think it will make a good story: I'm going to talk about how parents always worry about the shenanigans their kids will get into at prom. Then I'm going to talk about how this could be different if, in a perfect world, we got back to the "prom ideal." You see, this ideal actually comes from a good place and is in fact as pure as a Disney movie. I'll talk about how prom rally should be an affirming, rather than stressful and worrisome thing for both boys and girls. The boy asks, he is required to step up and be a man, he pays, etc. When a beautiful girl allows him to lead her across the dance floor, she is trusting him, making him feel like a man. Unfortunately, boys have taken to other activities on prom night that make them "feel like men" if you know what I mean. For girls, they get to feel beautiful and special and valued, because they are chosen and asked to the dance by a boy and then get to put on a fancy dress, twirl around, and be delighted in. Thinking about prom this way, makes me more excited and less nervous about attending. If all teens could think of it this way, there would be many parents with a few less gray hairs I believe. That's basically the gist of my topic. Input? What do you think? That was the first question.
Here's the second: What should my nickname be?? See, I've been thinking a lot about this and I spend a great deal of time giving nicknames to lots of people, which is fun. But I've never really had a good solid nickname. This is a part of growing up I feel that I'm missing out on. I know that a person cannot nickname themselves so I'm leaving up to you (praying it turns out alright). What should "the friends" all call me?? Nickname away!!
Wow. Okay yes I realize I'm a dork...live with it. At least it's amusing right?

On ROAR!!

I've been rereading C.S. Lewis' The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe, and I came across something that I'd just kind of read over the first time. It made me so excited that I just had to share it. As I read, it put a huge grin on my face...hopefully the same will be true for you.

"' Oh children,' said the Lion, 'I feel my strength coming back to me. Oh children catch me if you can!' He stood for a second, his eyes very bright, his limbs quivering, lashing himself with his tail Then he made a leap very high over their heads and landed on the other side of the Table. Laughing, though she didn't know why, Lucy scrambled over it to reach him. Aslan leaped again. A mad chase began. Round and round the hilltop he led them, now hopelessly out of their reach, now letting them almost catch his tail, now diving between them, now tossing them in the air with his huge and beautifully velveted paws and catching them again, and now stopping unexpectedly so that all three of them rolled over together in a happy laughing heap of fur and arms and legs. It was such a romp as no one has ever had except in Narnia and whether it was more like playing with a thunderstorm or playing with a kitten Lucy could never make up her mind. And the funny thing was that when all three finally lay together panting in the sun the girls no longer felt in the least tired or hungry or thirsty. 'And now,' said Aslan presently, 'to business. I feel I am going to roar. you had better put your fingers in your ears.' And they did. And Aslan stood up and when he opened his mouth to roar his face became so terrible that they did not dare to look at it. And they saw all the trees in front of him bend before the blast of his roaring as grass bends in a meadow before the wind."

On a glimmer of hope

This morning I was in bed and my brother came and woke me up (he does that a lot on Saturdays) and brought with him some of his Halloween candy. HE had separated all his Kit Kats (his favorite and my favorite) and had them in their own bag. Long story short, with no prompting from me, Keaton decided to share his Kit Kats with me. He had 22 Kit Kats and gave me 11 of them. Kit Kats are his favorite and he gave half of them to me. I said, "But Keaton, these are your favorites, why are you giving them to me?" And you know what he said?? He said, "That's 'cause you love 'em." There needs to be more big people like that.

On romance

Big Fish is one of my favorite movies. I love the way young Edward pursues his "future wife" towards the beginning of the movie. He even gives himself as a slave to a crazed werewolf-like circus owner just to learn information about her. When he finally found her, to win her heart, he filled her backyard full of daffodils (her favorite) flower. He said he'd contacted all the flower shops in three states. Today, when I got home from school, my yard was full of beautiful fall leaves. I love fall!!! I walked out, and watched the leaves swirl in the cool fall breeze. I sat on the rope swing and ate an apple. It was just one of those moments. I am loved...HE is pursuing me and it's wonderful. I love romantic things and fall as a beautiful gift of creation is one of the most romantic things I can think of.

On "wouldn't you like to be a creeper too?"

Alrighty, the most interesting thing that's happened to me during my 17th year so far... hiding in a cabinet as a favor to my history teacher on Tuesday. This is actually a very long and hilarious story, but it is one that has to be told in person, so for the full version feel free to call me. Here's the gist: I fit in the cabinet... my history teacher is kind of a nut job (we get along well)... that passing period was maybe the longest 5 minutes of my existence... I scratched creepily on the inside of the door and freaked a kid out really bad by sticking my hand out at him when he opened the door. Probably the best part was the reaction of the class when they realized it was me. There was this collective "what?" because really I don't usually act like that at school. Again, pretty exciting stuff...hopefully they'll be more random memories like that to come this year. As "birthday week" comes to a close, I'm realizing that I'm beginning a whole new year in which I can enjoy life. Grand and glorious adventures await!! We'll see how it all pans out.

On having a cold...again

I came up with a new one!!!

I'm phlegmboyant!

On oxymoron not so much

Wow! I didn't realize until now how long it's been since I last posted. I wanted to talk about the retreat at Camp Brosend last weekend. I was in a pretty weird place emotionally, but that's another story to be told another time. First, I wanted to talk about Camp Brosend. I love that place so much. To me, it is just so incredibly beautiful; there's always something to look at and be amazed by. But there are a lot of places like this, so why is this one special to me? Over the weekend, I finally figured it out. Fall retreat at Camp Brosend 2006. That was when I pretty much became "sungirl" I guess. I remember it was October and all the leaves had changed colors and I watched the sun go down and was astounded by how majestic the colors looked with the sun behind them.. It was probably the first time in my life that I was shocked, smacked in the face by the beauty of God's creation. I couldn't contain myself. I had to show everyone. For the rest of the weekend I ran around rejoicing in God's light. My family group would be talking and I'd have to interrupt and say, "Look, isn't the sun amazing?" I was overwhelmed and overjoyed. And now I know why Camp Brosend is so special to me. I'd never been able to pinpoint the transformation before, but there it was. Next, I wanted to talk about something kind of confusing. As a girl, a Bible verse close to my heart is 1 Peter 3:3-4.

Your beauty should not come from outward adornment such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight.

I guess to me, this is kind of a goal. Then, there's this other verse that I really like, but I always thought it was kind of contradictory. It's 2 Timothy 1:7.

For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love, and of self-discipline.

So how do you have a spirit of power and of gentleness??? Gentle power, an oxymoron n'est-ce pas? Not so much. Duh!! The Holy Spirit, hello!! Doesn't God exhibit a gentle power sometimes?? I got a chance to witness this at the retreat. Eric discussed unity within our group and told people to pray with someone who you needed to maybe mend a relationship with. People paired off. Good stuff happened. It was gentle. It was powerful. There you go, my mind's at peace with this one now. Prayer is the perfect example of gentle power. Prayer is so powerful, yet there's no brute force or anything like that. How amazing!! And I'm much more okay with being gentle now. Gentle can be powerful...not that I'm power hungry or anything. Gentle doesn't have to mean babied, just nice, approachable, comforting. There you go.

On extended metaphor

I had to write this poem thing for English class so I thought I'd share:
Rest is orange.
Calm is yellow.
Quiet is brown.
Comfort is red.
Peace is a fall leaf.
She does not fight the wind,
But lets herself be carried
down
down
down.
No exertion is wasted.
She simply lets life swirl her as she floats.
Troubling storms come.
They ravage, leaving scars.
But she remains still through it all.
Her appearance is of little concern.
Even with holes she displays her beauty,
A gift to the world.
Lying on the ground, she asks
But does not--never begs
To be noticed.
No activities busy her.
She is content to just be.
Whether trampled or saved and treasured,
She is a leaf.
That is all she needs.
Rest is orange.
Calm is yellow.
Quiet is brown.
Comfort is red.
You pray for peace,
I gift you a fall leaf.

On Starfish...it's close

I bet you wish you knew what that meant...tough. Suffice it to say that it's a source of joy in my life anyway.

I have compiled a list of things that I strongly recommend if you haven't laughed or felt happy in a while:

1. Tear down a barn and burn it...very therapeutic

2. Eat pizza for several consecutive meals
3. Play board games with friends...this is especially enjoyable if you've just torn down a barn and are considerably tired
4. Harbor a weird possibly poisonous pet and name him
5. Have a funeral/burial for previously mentioned pet
6. Spend so much time with a select group of individuals that you practically have your own language because of all the inside jokes
7. Play four square without getting mad and arguing (I would recommend falling on your butt a couple times, just to keep things light and funny)
8. Reflect upon all these happy things you've just done then smile and nod

Oh yeah...this post is some kinda awesome.

On "Phlegmentations"

So I'm not going to say that it was the worst cold of my life... because that would just be inviting an even worse cold to come around, but it was a really bad cold. I am currently getting over a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad cold. As in, my nose in rubbed raw from the excess of Kleenex that it has come in contact with this week. Today, I was told that my voice sounds like a robot's, ( that was a kind description). I'm basically a mess and am soooo glad it's the weekend. Getting out of you're seat every two minutes during class to blow your nose isn't exactly fun. Actually it's pretty miserable and embarrassing! This little saga began on Tuesday, but today I am actually feeling a whole lot better...almost like a human being again. Sorry about the complaining I did in this post, I really don't like to complain and I really don't like it when other people complain, but I thought of the amazing title and really just had to get all the crappiness out there. How about a life lesson to end with so I didn't totally waste your time: appreciate your health before you don't have it anymore. Okay, so that was super cliche and I apologize, but I've got the rant out of my system. I'm all done phlegmenting now. Ah phlegm, now there's a fun word.

On Freedom

From 11/19/06
"One of the many reason that I LOVE Christ is the freedom that is gained from serving Him. 'I am free to RUN, I am free to DANCE, I am free to LIVE FOR YOU, I am FREE!!'---I love that Newsboys song. I think the first time I heard it was at the fall retreat at Camp Brosend. Wow!! The Holy Spirit really flooded through me. I received this image, a representation of freedom. The image was of my LEAPING from the top of a mountain (I LIKE mountains) with my arms outstretched and an ENORMOUS smile on my face. There was no fear, no careful worrisome thoughts. Just an exhilarating leap into the air knowing full well that I was going to be fine because I had God. Wow, that experience made me soooo EXCITED. I felt that even if my mind and body weren't strong enough for the jump, my heart was. Daily I want, long to make that giant leap into a deeper, more TREMENDOUS passion for Christ."

Hey, cool. you know what?? I have grown deeper and closer since then...neato.

On passion, revisited

I stumbled upon a lot of little writings that I did my freshman year...not as an assignment or anything, just writing. I'm really glad I saved them because I feel so energized by the passion in what I wrote. Looking at the paper, you can tell I was really excited and really meant what I wrote, because of the messy handwriting and all the underlining and capital letters I used. So, I've decided for the next few posts, I will be sharing those old thoughts that probably should be resurrected in my life.
"The Sun
A source of light (duh) and an ASTOUNDING, joyful energy. When I see it, I have to stare, usually until I see spots, wow. It just makes me SMILE. I can't describe the ultra INCREDIBLE rush I get from watching the sun come up, it's so pretty and EXCITING! Seeing it makes me want to be in a musical, leaping about; I'm just HAPPY!!! The sheer beauty and wonder of the sun is a true AWESOME demonstration of God's power and majesty. Next to people the SUN is my FAVORITE thing in creation. I want to praise the Lord by doing something crazy. When the sunrise is particularly BEAUTIFUL, I want to stand on a mountain top and DANCE. I like to pretend or I guess HOPE that the sun is a little glimpse of HEAVEN. Something special to be seen by those conscious enough to notice. if I'm right,, then hooray, but if not, then that means that heaven is even more gorgeous! WOW!! Something to look forward to..."

Apparently, on November 19, 2006 I was really freaking out about the sun...fun huh?

On "I'd missed you my friend"

Last night, I jumped in the big long puddle in the church parking lot. I hadn't done that in a very long time. It was refreshing...hadn't realized how much I'd missed it. I guess I love it because I feel God in those little moments that you're doing something weird to intentionally worship. Anyway, it was great. Then I got locked out of the church and almost missed Jill's baptism...life is full of adventures right?

On memories

I love looking at old pictures!!! Here are a few fun ones from "way back when" to enjoy.

On Don't you love those ideas you get in the shower?

Hopefully most of you already know this. I guess I didn't because when the thought occurred to me it was a major revelation. Here goes: There has never been a short epic. Otherwise it wouldn't be an epic. Epics also take place over lots and lots of time, sometimes years. My life's journey in Christ is nowhere near to being over. There is still adventure to be sought out, battles to be won, and lots lots more learning and growing to do. I'm entangled in an epic, not a short story. I'm really not sure why I'd been thinking that I was almost done. Oh no, we're still in the very beginning pages. God has introduced Himself as the main character and now there's a lot of action that will be taking place.

On Where have all the cookies gone?

Do you remember those commercials?? "Where have all the cookies gone? Into Hershey's Cookies and Cream!" Well those candy bars are very good and here's just one of those moments where my brain works really funny. With all these people going away...either moving because they don't really have a choice or moving because they feel they're being called somewhere else...I've been kind of feeling like: hey, where have all the awesome people gone? Okay so in the commercial, it's all these empty cookie jars with people looking into them with looks of shock on their faces. Then, it reveals that all the cookies went to go make these amazing candy bars. They "took away" something good from people to make something else that's really really cool. So, what if God's plan for me, for my friends, for the world, is like a Cookies and Cream candy bar? He has a bigger, better plan that I can't understand and He's sending all these people to different places to achieve His will. In essence, "taking" them away from me to create the bigger picture, the candy bar. I really don't know, but I think it's something like that. Maybe while I'm like, "Hey, I really miss those cookies," God is saying, "Wow! Look at this radical candy bar I'm making!"

On tree, lake, brook

"Grow upward as trees, and seek My face. Dwell deep, as the lake, and know My fullness and quiet. And move ever, always, determinedly onward as the brook does; and keep the outflow of your life ever in motion...So the trees would say to you, Speak. Speak to Me, speak of Me--for I am always speaking. And the lake would say to you, Be still. Be still before Me in communion, and be still at times even in the company of others, so you may enjoy the lesson of the lake in mutual fellowship. And Move. Find the channel of creativity within your soul. I have made no one without it. Some have choked it with indifference, others have despised it in rebellion; others have ignored it in foolishness; others have twisted it in bitterness. But I stand ready to come to the assistance of any man or woman who sincerely endeavors to find this channel, to remove debris, to repair damage or straighten the course, and most of all to enter the flow. It is the flow of divine life." --from Come Away My Beloved

I really don't think that there's much I can add to that. Look up and seek Him. Seek His face. That was my devotional this morning and it certainly smacked me in my face. Come Away My Beloved is one of the most amazing books I've ever read. I read a little every morning and it can be pretty overwhelming. Like this morning, "speak to me...be still...move" just the encouragement and at the same time rebuking motivation I've been in need of this summer. I could be accused of having not only a lazy body this season, but also a lazy heart. I think at times we all need to reawaken and relearn how to use our hearts. The passage above was one that helped me refocus so I just thought I'd share.

I'm so glad I've started writing again!!! It's funny how sometimes there's been a wall up and you never even knew it was there until something knocks it down.

On joy to the fishies

Yes I think the time has come for me to talk about my trip to Texas. We had a really good time, except for the creepy "crack-zone" motel. Sea World was pretty stinking amazing. We saw lots of show, I was very very impressed...belugas are really weird animals just so you know. Anyway, it was really cool to watch the trainers and the animals interact. We saw dolphins, sea lions, a performing otter, and of course Shamu. HE"S HUGE!!!! We sat towards the front of the stadium for that one and got splashed big time. The coolest thing ever (I think) is that while we were there, I got to pet some dolphins. It was so neat. I pretty much felt like a four year old and my dad kept taking me back to the dolphin pool and buying me more fish so I could pet them some more. Now I really can't stop talking about how I touched a dolphin...it's actually a really cool thing to bring up if there's ever an awkward silence, yeah dolphins rock. I bought a kids dolphin shirt as my souvenir, its basically the coolest thing ever... the dolphins on it are purple, pretty wild stuff. Oh and my dad bought me a mood necklace (go Relient K) that has Shamu on it and it seems that for that last couple weeks I've been pretty purple. So Sea World was really fun, they had some cool rides with really funny messages that played while you waited in line. They had the usual about securing your hats and things , but one ride warned you that you had better keep your prosthetic devices screwed on tight or they might fall off and another that your anything on your person would get "soaked". Yes lots of laughs and jokes about flying fake arms. Now let me get to what was probably my favorite part of the experience. The fish tanks. The aquarium there housed so many fish! They were all so different...it was so neat!!!! I wanted to stay there and sit watching the fish for hours, I really could have. It was really strange, but watching all those fish swimming around made me want to sit and write really bad. Wanting to sit and write obviously isn't strange for me, but I thought it was odd that it was fish that brought on that feeling. I don't know they just made me so full of joy...God's creation is just so...brilliant. There were these silver fish that were almost completely flat, you could barely see them when they turned and faced you. I liked the striped fish best probably, there was a really pretty kind that was white and yellow with really thin blue stripes. There was also this fish that looked like one of those sad clowns with a big red mouth...extremely funny. Swimming at the top of the tank were sting rays and I got to watch a diver feed them by hand. It was pretty cool to watch how the sting rays interacted with him. It was almost like they were nuzzling him.

The rest of the trip wasn't bad either. In San Antonio, we ate at the Hard Rock Cafe and visited the Alamo. I really enjoyed going to see the neighborhood where my dad used to live. Some of those neighbors still live there and had lots of stories to tell. Sitting and getting to listen to all of them was really neat. At the reunion, I pitched washers (okay yeah I know totally redneck but the game is actually kind of fun with pretty advanced rules) with the best of them. Well, maybe not the best of them, but my team held its own for a while. So, yeah Texas was a fun trip. I've included pictures for your viewing pleasure. Before you get to jealous of my adventures though I will add that it was really stinking hot (check out the picture of the car thermometer).

PS Fish rock.

On ROAD TRIP!

We're getting ready to head out for Texas. Please keep my family in your prayers as we travel and pray for me that I'm not headed off to the loony bin after this vacation. I really do love my family very much, but it's very possible that I will be driven nuts by them before the ten days are up. I'm looking forward to getting away from regular life for a little while with all the crazy stuff that's been going on. We're going to Sea World while we're down there so that should be fun. I don't really have anything profound, touching, or introspective to write today, but I just wanted to ask for prayers. Remember my family all stuck in a minivan for nineteen hours and pray for my youth group too-- we're having some hard times right now but we're pressing on--thanks, have a good day. Hopefully I'll bring back some cool pictures that look like Free Willy.

On School's out for the SUMMER

HECK YES!!!!!!!

enough said.

On Darin you better read this because I titled it just for you: This Beautiful Mess

I miss winter. Don't get me wrong I do love Spring, my tree is BEAutiful and the weather is oh so nice, but by the circle of life, Spring is also a time of change. Change, there has been quite a lot of that going on and with my OCD tendencies, I'm not especially good with change. This week has been pretty emotionally draining for me, I've pretty much been perpetually in tears. But I've now decided that I've been making things a lot more complicated than they need to be. it's really quite simple see I have zero control over any of it, so therefore I have to learn vulnerability... to trust, to lean, to allow God to continuing teaching me even through the hard times. Some of the change makes me sad, even though it is the right thing, so basically I don't know how I'm supposed to be feeling right now. However, despite the fact that I'm a COMPLETE MESS, I've decided to just praise God through it. I think He really loves that. So, in the next few days I'll probably be found either 1) crying my eyes out for no apparent reason or 2) running and dancing and singing and praising in the backyard under the sun with the dandelions. Yes you don't have to tell me, I know it doesn't make sense. God is using these hard times when I've slowed down, stopped, and looked around to really really romance my heart and hold my hand through all of it. He wants me to let Him be there for me. I think that 's really great. I could go on and on about the ways God has made the difficult moments so beautiful, (one example being an entire backyard full of white dandelions). So, I'm going to focus on joy, because without joy what do you have?? And as Lydia reminded me this morning: "Star people do not shed tears, but light."

Here I sigh with relief that God loves us beautiful messes (I actually know quite a few right now).

Sungirl

On lately

Hello dear ones, I'm sure you missed me. Well, maybe not since no one commented on my last post, that's perfectly okay though. I decided not to let my blog fizzle out, so I'm updating today. Let's see what's been going on in my life...

Hmmm... the Wednesday before Spring Break I gave my testimony for our church worship night with the youth. Being able to do that was an incredible blessing. The night focused in on how we are, always have been, and always will be God's beloved (the joy I get from knowing that, OH MY GOODNESS!!). Anyway, the whole thing was really cool, I think the best part was when I shared my Princess story that I posted a long time ago, people got it and that made me really excited.

Spring is here, (mostly) and I am overjoyed!!! The Lindsey Memorial Garden is in bloom, with little pink flowers on my weeping cherry tree and buds on the tulip plants. It is soooooo beautiful and it's making me so excited!!! I love love love spring, everything is green and new and there's a lot of other cliche statements that I could make about it, but just so you know, I love it.

A really major change is going to be happening in my life soon, that is Hannah and Jonathan (my pretend parents) are leaving in two weeks for their year long mission experience. I am going to miss the two of them SO MUCH. So, yes I've been pretty much an idiot to get so close to them, ha ha, but now I just adore them and will be so so so so so sad when they leave. Life will go on however ,I am building up a reservoir of good memories to have once they're gone.

I'm also very excited about the Florida trip this summer. No not really excited, more ecstatic!! I can't wait. It's going to be so nice to just get away from everything to focus on what God wants for my youth group, and to focus on loving others and growing with them. I am also curious to see how God will work in my life while we're there and in the lives of everyone else. I'm still growing growing growing everyday and it is awesome!! This week I am studying in Philippians and am curious to see where I'm led with that. No one's really missed much, my days are still filled with joy and peace and best of all love because "all you need is love" (The Beatles).

So, I wish you all amazing days, weeks, and months. And remember, "you're never fully dressed without a smile." Hmmm, I guess that means some of you are naked... AWKWARD!!!
Bye.

On "Oh my goodness I haven't posted since forever!!!"

It has certainly been awhile. I really am not sure what to write about. Well, how about I tell about me weekend last weekend. Here we go. I have wanted to go on a Chrysalis weekend since I was very young and saw all the teenagers in my mom and dad's group at Epworth go and come back so amazed and excited. I went in expecting the weekend to be a time of growth in Christ and fellowship with other strong believers. This was not really the case. It was a fun weekend; it was good to get out of the house for a while, however it was not at all what I was expecting. I think the weekend was especially hard for me just because I'm kind of shy around people I don't know, it's hard for me to open up. Once I know you, forget the shy part, I'll talk you're ear off, but I just have a really hard time with the whole "getting to know" people business. I only knew a couple of people there and (I'm going to say this without sounding hateful or prideful) I felt that I was one of the few young people there that were truly strong in their faith. We had talks about how Jesus loves us, how He wants a relationship with us, and how He can transform our lives. This transformation process has been my life for about two years now. They were good talks and it was cool to see how many people were allowing God to move them for the first time. However, most of the time, I kept thinking (selfishly) that I wished there could be a retreat for me. It wasn't until I got home that I realized hello, duh--I don't need a retreat, because what? God is growing me everyday at home. The realization of this made me feel a lot better.
One part of the weekend that was pretty awesome was the agape letters. If there had been any doubt that my love language was 'words of affirmation,' there's not anymore. Reading all those encouraging words was so neat! That hour that I sat on a hill reading all those notes, (bawling like a baby of course, because that's just what I do), was one of the times that I've felt God's love through other people the strongest.
Another way God has been really moving in my life lately, has been during our quiet time. Since Sunday when I told Darin that I wanted to give my testimony at church sometime, God has been filling my mind with the exact right words. I mean, it's my story so it's not like I need to memorize anything, but I feel that God wants me to focus (in my talk) less on my past like I had planned on doing, and more on our story and the love and joy that I have found in Him. At first, I said to Darin that I wasn't sure how soon I wanted to do this, but since I've prayed more about it, I can't wait!! I'm completely excited!
Okay, I'm pretty much done know, but PRAISE GOD for the snow!!!!!! I just love it. And I thought you all would like to know that last night (Thursday) I prayed hard that we wouldn't have school today, and we didn't, so your welcome to some of you. Well, have an absolutely positively fantastic day!!

On being busy, busy, busy

Hello Friends!!
I haven't written in a long while, so I thought I'd update a little. Let's see... Isn't it weird how nothing and everything can be happening at the same time? While you're in the moment, it seems like everything is happening, that there's so much going on, but then when you look back and think about what went on during those times, you think, huh nothing much has happened. Oh well, everything is good over here. I really want a snow day where there is actual snow!! That would be soooooo grand. School was absolutely crazy this week, I felt so busy. I missed two days last week because of my lethal cold, so this week I had a ton of stuff to make up. I was a little worried that I wasn't going to get it all done and was really really grumpy, but in the end I came out on top. God's good that way. For example, today I got the dreaded Chemistry test back. You see, being absent I had missed most of the notes for the section we were working on in Chemistry, so I had to teach myself most of the material. Then, when I had to make up the test on Wednesday, it was completely awful. I thought that I had done very badly. But today I got my grade back and B+!!!!!!! I'm so excited! I know that's a pretty dumb thing to be excited about, seeing as how in ten years its not going to matter what grade I got in Chemistry. However, I try to do well in school, so grades have their importance in my life. I'm just glad this week is over and that I'm all caught up. I've also been making progress with a special project (not for school) on my own. It's all very secret, so I can't disclose too much, but it's hard to keep my trap shut about it because I'm so thrilled.
Oh, by the way I've decided I'm going to start a New Year's resolution. I know that it's February and people don't really have New Year's resolutions in February, but I think this is important. It has come to my attention that I yammer on way too much. Just read my blog and you'll see what I'm talking about... ha ha wait... you are reading my blog ha ha. Anyway, I fing myself in many situations when I have to put my foot in my mouth. Now I thought, I either need to become more flexible or I need to quit letting my mouth get ahead of me. So, since I hate exercise, I'm going for the talking less and being careful option. I think that if I really work at it good will come of it. Ha ha "good will come of it," nobody talks like that anymore! I love saying stuff like that. Okay, so I guess I'm about done here. Have a fabulous week, day, evening, or whatever. Later.

On...ahhhh, I got nothing.

Hey kids, sorry its been awhile. There really hasn't been a whole lot to report. Well, there might be one thing, but I'm going to wait until after Monday to write about it because the whole situation is still awaitng a verdict. Anyway, everythings fine here. I'm listening to Mood Rings by Relient K, my dad is like in love with that song. He thinks it describes the females in my family or something...not really sure where he gets that from, ha ha. So, today I got to go with Hannah to a women's misson thing at Grace Baptist Church, because she was speaknig there. I somewhat successfully ran her power point. It was a pretty interesting morning... imust love her a lot to hove gotten up at 8:00 this Saturday morning!! Ha ha, now the song is Sadie Hawkins Dance. I guess I'm done. School is dumb, but it's the mission field God has me in now, so I'm gonna live with it. Oh and we are in the process of switching over to wow-way, so I'm going to have an email address now. Yeah, big exciting news right? Anyhow, it's gonna be this: asastarintheuniverse@wowway.com. Broken down for the simple man, that's "as a star in the universe" from Phillipians 2:15. Oh yeah, new picture, it's from Chirstmas at my grandma and grandpa's. "Baby do you like my sweater?"--sorry if you don't get that. Anyway, it's me and my uncle Matt's girlfriend Debbie there with me. How do you think I look as a blonde? Scary right? Later.

On a new year

Hello and welcome to the new year, 2008. Here's the host for today's show... Lindsey. I could probably write a million different cliche things about the beginning of a new year. It's a fresh start, you can turn over a new leaf, look ahead to what this year has in store. All of these things are true, but I get tired of hearing them, so I'll just fill everyone in on how my trip was.

I went up to Michigan again, but this time we stayed mostly with my mom's family. No uglydolls this time. By the way, I took that picture down after my friend Jaymen commented that he couldn't tell which one was me and which one was the ugly doll, ha ha. So instead I inserted a picture from the New Orleans trip. No tourists threw money at my feet, apparently I'm not a very good dancer. Anyway, my Christmas was grand. I was sick for a couple days which was kind of nightmarish, but I'm mostly better now. I won't be missing school (rats!) or anything. I got to spend a lot of time with my family just chilling in Holland, Michigan where there was, can you even believe it, SNOW!!!!!! I love snow. I got to go sledding!!! I wish it would snow here. I'd been praying and praying for snow before Christmas Break! Oh well, I guess I got my fix up there. Also, one of the days when we visited my dad's family, we went snow skiing. I'll wait a moment as you fall over with laughter trying to picture me skiing.

Are you finished? Good. All of the disasters you pictured probably happened, except no broken bones. Me skiing was basically like this: you know what babies are like when they first come out of the womb? There's a lot of flailing and they're covered with gunk. That was basically me except I had pointy objects coming out of my feet and the 'gunk' was actually just snow. Oh my it was quite an experience. I ended up having fun, but I 'm not sure I would exactly jump at the chance to do it again.

Okay, so it's 4:30 here and the sun is going down outside my window. Isn't that weird? During the winter, everything is crazy. I do love the cold weather, but I wish it wasn't so cold and windy right now, you can' even go walk around outside.

Alright, well I'm basically done for now. in case you're interested, I was pleased with the grades I got on my finals. I even survived the dreaded French exam. Thanks to everyone who helped out with my Journalism final story. I don;t now how well I did on that yet. Hopefully not too bad, my teacher seemed to like my writing. Anyway, have a great week or weekend rather since that's what's coming up soon. Be blessed. I can't wait to be with all my Newburgh friends, I've missed you all!